Ok, so this is personal, very personal!
This was a picture of a housing complex taken by me. The rooms made me claustrophobic.
I am known to be somebody who takes quick decisions. That gift of 'window shopping' does not sit well with me. From relationships to career decisions, I have always been an impulsive child! Some of the decisions were right others, well disastrous... I feel like Howard Wolowitz of TBBT who keeps on taking the bad decision of going to space when he hates space. It has taken me more than a year to write about this ordeal and I am not going to hide the facts. I fell in love with the corporate life back when I was interning with ITC, Wills lifestyle in 2014. I liked the office culture & the work. So when I got an offer to work in Mumbai in 2018 I was naturally excited. A little amount of self-persuasion and then ultimately with immense conviction I shifted to Mumbai in November 2018. The first 4 of months were fine and then things took a very ugly turn.
So why did I leave Mumbai?
Don't get me wrong, I still think it might have been a mistake to leave Mumbai. I would have been financially much stronger. Today I could have owned a flat or a car instead of living in a rented place. But at that point, I gave up! I could never adjust to life in Mumbai. There was no space to live in. I used to live in this highrise in a 1RK. For people who did not know what an Rk is all about, RK stands for 1 room + Kitchen + Bathroom. I felt claustrophobic there.
My company was a small startup in a 2BHK flat! I know I am complaining about nothing and even this is considered a privilege there. Startups are fun, fast and dynamic yet it started being repetitive & boring. I would end up downloading images from shutterstock, colour correcting it and using it for all kinds of promotions. This became frustrating very soon. It was from April 2018 that I felt that I am not going anywhere. It came down to the fact that the company could not pay my salary any longer. The condition became severe day by day and with very little money living a normal life in Mumbai became impossible. I started having anxiety attacks on a regular basis and could not function properly.
My confidence took a hit because of all the anxiety attacks. I was never out of jobs though and when I realized that my time in this company is numbered I tried reaching out to other companies. I landed myself with good offers in Mumbai. But because of the mental ground, I could never take those opportunities. I have lost out on big money and opportunities but leaving Mumbai was important to keep my sanity. I wanted to feel better again, I wanted to smile again, I wanted to restart my life.
I returned home penniless but with a lot of experience of what not to do in life.
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